Stress

Three Ways to Make Life Transitions Even Harder

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Time management rough roadHave you ever driven on a paved mountain road only to turn left and suddenly be on a bumpy gravel path? Do you drive the same way? Or do you quickly adjust your speed and attention to the new driving conditions? Unfortunately, we aren’t always so quick to adjust to life transitions. Here are three ways we make our life transitions harder than they need to be:

1. Refuse to Accept Change

Sometimes when our daily routine is modified, we spend the first few days (weeks, months, years) refusing to belief that anything is different. We either fight the change, complain about it, grumble about how good it “used to be,” or some combination of the three. This not only wastes our time, but it causes undue frustration and stress.

2. Try to Solve New Problems with the Same Solutions

Once we realize things have changed, we must also realize that the way we approach problems will need to change too. What used to work might not work anymore. It’s like trying to nail a picture to the wall using a sledgehammer. Reach into your toolbox and look for something different.

3. Don’t Seek Help

No matter how strange your new situation may seem- whether it’s a new job, new family arrangement, new schedule, or new location- you’re not the first person to go through this transition. Why reinvent the wheel when so many others have gone before you? Reach out to other people who have made a similar transition and ask how they handled it.

If you’re a long time Time Diet reader, you know I’m going through my fair share of transitions right now (finishing the PhD, baby on the way, etc…) That’s why I love this blog. It’s a way we can all support each other.

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One Way to Avoid Stress This Holiday Season

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Time Management HolidayMy mouth has started watering for the massive turkey dinner I’ll be consuming this week, which means the holiday season is officially upon us…and all the stress that comes with it. As the year winds to a close, our to-do lists get incredibly long. Deadlines, holiday gatherings, huge projects we’ve been putting off…they all start to weigh on us and interfere with our holiday cheer. This season, I have one piece of advice for you to try…

Lower Your Expectations

What? Really Emily? That’s the advice you have for us? Isn’t that kind of…depressing?

No. Let me explain.

If you’re a great time manager all year, there is no reason you can’t also be a great time manager during the holidays. The thing that changes seems to be our expectations. I’m reading a fascinating book called Stumbling on Happiness and the author mentions that humans are the only animal to think and make predictions about the future. We spend vast amounts of time envisioning what the future should be like, and then become extremely disappointed if it doesn’t pan out that way.

When is this ever more true than during the holidays? We’ve spent all fall crafting a picture-perfect holiday image, looking forward to knocking everything off our to-do lists, curling up by a roaring fire with our care-free do-nothingness, sipping some eggnog and listening to the rain fall lightly on our back porch.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t have goals or look forward to certain things about the holidays. I’m saying stop being so hard on yourself when things don’t happen exactly as you envisioned. There might still be a few things on your list that cling there through January. The eggnog might be apple cider because you got to the store late and the guy in front of you grabbed the last jug. It’s OK.

This holiday season, let go of perfection. And also, let go of your smartphone for a few minutes while you’re at it.  Put your impossible expectations to rest and accept that you’re going to finish what you can, doing the BEST you can, and that’s going to be good enough. Find time to relax with your friends and family, even if it doesn’t end up looking like something straight out of a holiday TV special.

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Time Management for a Merrier Holiday Season

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Time Management HolidayIt’s December, and all of the dashing through parking lots, decking the halls, and increased number of deadlines can create a time management crisis that makes us feel less than jolly. Just follow these tips to rein in your holiday schedule so you have time to enjoy the season with your friends and family.

1. Ask for Help

At the beginning of December, we optimistically think that we can handle everything ourselves. Despite the longer work hours and lengthier to-do lists, we think we’ll be able to do it all without any help. Then, sometime around the 17th or 18th of December, we start to crack.

Don’t let it get to that point. Ask for help in advance. Don’t put off big projects until the day before your vacation hoping they will just…happen. Be realistic at work and delegate when you need to. Instead of throwing a huge party for your family and friends, ask everyone to bring a dish and embrace the decreased workload that comes with a potluck.

2. Make One Trip

During the holiday season, all retailers and grocery stores try to tempt you into their shops. It’s easy to think you need to make it to all of them, but this makes your shopping take three times as long. It’s not worth saving ten cents a pound on the Christmas turkey if you have to drive 40 minutes out of your way to go get it. Your sister will appreciate the sweater from the store down the street just as much as the one from the mall in the next town over.

3. Plan Some Quiet Time

In the hustle and bustle of the season, it’s easy to get swept up in it all and forget to step back and enjoy it. Free time will definitely not just happen at this time of year. You have to make it. Set aside a few evenings to stay in and relax. There will always be shopping to do, or parties to attend, or community events to check out. You probably already have enough mandatory extra activities, such as overtime at work or an increase in deadlines at the end of the year. Make up for it by skipping out on one of the optional activities and staying home instead.

It’s tempting to fill up our calendars with loads of holiday cheer, but the best way to enjoy the holidays is to simply step back and breathe.

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Removing the Weight From Your Schedule

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Having excellent time management skills requires a feeling of control. As soon as the feeling of control goes away, your stress level increases and you become far less productive. That’s why it’s sometimes better to devote time to the task that’s weighing on you the most, even if it isn’t necessarily the most important thing you have to do at the moment.

For example, I had a big presentation coming up that, for whatever reason, was weighing on me. I found that while I was trying to work on more immediate and pressing things, this presentation was all I could think about.

I’d been having extremely productive workdays, but I didn’t feel productive. I may have been accomplishing important things, but the one thing that was stressing me was still looming.

Even though it wasn’t my most pressing deadline, I needed to devote a little time to this presentation or I was going to continue feeling stressed and not in control of my day.

I finally just dedicated a few hours to sketching out ideas. Seeing my thoughts down on paper gave me so much more confidence in my ability to finish this project. Pretty soon, I had a solid outline of what I planned to talk about, and my stress level had significantly decreased.

My presentation was far from finished, but I now felt I had a handle on it and had a clear mind to devote to other more pressing tasks.

Do you have a looming task that is stressing you out? Carve out a little time to get started now, even if the deadline is far away. Otherwise, the pressure of this impending task will just continue to build and start to interfere with your ability to focus on other things. The best way to remove the stressful weight of a task from your shoulders is to just do it.

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Time Management Paralysis

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Sometimes, when we have so much to do that we become overwhelmed with all of our impending deadlines, we freeze up and end up accomplishing nothing. This is what I call Time Management Paralysis and it is a huge hurdle to overcome in our Time Diets.

Time Management Paralysis is a problem because it causes our stress level to rise and our productivity level to sink. It isn’t caused by laziness or disorganization. It’s caused by a hectic schedule and a lengthy to-do list where everything seems of equal importance.

This week, I had to overcome a serious case of Time Management Paralysis. I went up to my office, sat down at my computer, looked at my list of tasks…and froze. I didn’t know what to do first. I’m staring down a jam-packed month of seminars, conference presentations, deadlines and projects. Everything I needed to do seemed like a big, daunting task that had to be a priority. When everything is a priority, nothing gets done.

Here is how I regained my productivity.

Four Steps to Fight Time Management Paralysis

1) Calm Down
It may seem simple, but a huge part of Time Management Paralysis is all in your head. If you spend too much time thinking about the huge stack of work you have to do, you psyche yourself out for failure. Don’t let yourself spend precious energy on self-doubt. (Loyal readers know my favorite story about the two cows that illustrates this point.)

2) Write it Down
All of our deadlines and obligations can get tangled up in our heads. Take the time to write down everything that needs to be done, even if it doesn’t seem very organized. Just putting it all down on paper can free up valuable brainpower, allow us to think more clearly, and bring back that feeling of control.

3) Break it Up
When writing down all of your big “Meat” tasks, be sure to break them up into smaller more manageable pieces. For example, I am giving a presentation in Texas next month. When I see “Create San Antonio Presentation” on my list, it sounds difficult and daunting. Instead, I broke that task up into smaller chunks and wrote, “sketch out speech,” “create slides,” “make hand out,” etc…Those smaller tasks are easier to complete and remove the anxiety of tackling something huge.

4) Set Yourself Up to Win
We know our strengths and we know that some tasks are bound to give us more frustration than others. When you are trying to overcome a case of Time Management Paralysis, start off with a task you know you’ll be able to finish. Experiencing some productivity success will give you the momentum to tackle the tasks that are more likely to pose a challenge.

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Photo Credit: David Castillo Dominici

A Procrastinator’s Holiday

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Happy Holidays from The Time Diet!

(sung to the tune of Jingle Bells)

“Dashing through the mall
More gifts are left to buy
My calendar’s so full
It’s bursting at the sides!

So much work to do
So much on my plate
Maybe this will be the year
I don’t procrastinate!

Oh….

Calendars, To-Do Lists
Planning all the way
Next year I’ll be organized
And that’s the way I’ll stay (Hey!)
Time Killers, Distractions
They won’t bother me
2012 will be the year
Of productivity!”

Wishing you and your family a Happy Holiday and a Joyous New Year!

~Emily Schwartz

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The Slow Day List

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During crunch time,  don’t you find yourself saying, “Why in the world didn’t I do this sooner??” That is why using a “Slow Day List” is so important.

We all have days that are busier than others. A Slow Day List is where we keep track of things we can do on less-busy days to help prepare for our stressful ones. During our most hectic times of the year, we’ve all thought to ourselves, “Next time, I’m going to do _______sooner,” but then… we forget.

A Slow Day List is a place to keep track of those things, so next time you have a less-busy day, you can easily remember exactly what to do to get ahead.

Crunch Time

The time between mid-November and mid-December is my “crunch time.” As a music teacher, I have six concerts to get my students ready for. As a student, I have papers to write and reading to finish. As a college teacher, I have assignments to assess and grades to prepare. As a person, I want to squeeze in time to enjoy the holiday season.

During this crazy time of year, I have added many things to my Slow Day List that I can hopefully do next year to ease my stress. I wanted to share some of those with you in the hopes that you too will start your own list!

Emily’s Slow Day List

1) Automate my Grading
I have 44 students in the online class I teach, and I made individual rubrics for each one of because I thought it was easier than figuring out the University’s automatic system…nope! On my next slow day I will figure out how to use the system so my grades are automatically tabulated. It will save me tons of time next year.

2) Make my Concert Programs on the First Day
I know my students save the programs from their first band concert, so I don’t want to leave any one’s name off. However, the small task of making this piece of paper always sneaks up on me and I end up rushing through it. Next time, I’m going to make the program on the first day of the quarter when I first set up my class roster. There is no reason not to!

3) Outline Papers Earlier
It is always easier to write papers from an outline, rather than from a blank screen. I may not want to write my paper too far in advance, since we’re not done covering material, but that doesn’t mean I can’t start sketching out my ideas.

4) Get Decorations Ready Earlier
I don’t need to put up my Christmas tree on Columbus Day, but making time for being festive once Thanksgiving is over is difficult with my other obligations. Next year, I will have my decorations ready to go before the holiday season starts getting busy.

What will you add to your Slow Day List?

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The Rule of Three

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Do you have more than three big things on your plate at any given time? If so, you might be overloading yourself.

This weekend, I stumbled across an article in a parenting magazine that I found surprisingly relevant to time management. (It should be noted that I am not a parent, however, when you’re on an airplane and forget to bring a book, you’re at the mercy of whatever reading material the person before you left in the seat-back pocket.)

The article was about how to make sure your child is engaged in enough activities with out being overloaded with too many things. The author referenced something called “The Rule of Three.”

The Rule of Three comes from the chain of command in the U.S. Marine Corps. Apparently, Marines are given no more than three things to worry about at any given time. There are three people assigned to a fire team with the fourth being their leader. Three teams are assigned to one squad and three squads are assigned to one platoon. The number “3” wasn’t just chosen at random either. The Marines experimented with a “Rule of Four,” and a “Rule of Two,” neither of which was as effective and efficient.

The point of the parenting article was to say that if you have your child involved in more than three activities (including school) you are asking them to keep track of more than a Marine, and that just isn’t fair!

When I read this, I couldn’t help but think that this is good advice for everyone, not just for parents of stressed-out children. Do we have the luxury of being able to limit ourselves to three things at a time? Sometimes it doesn’t feel like it. Often, if we want to go to school, or have a job, or make time for our families and friends, we will end up with far more than three things to keep track of.

Therefore, I think The Rule of Three applies to focus almost more than involvement. You may be involved with countless responsibilities, but recognize that you’ll have to scale back your focus on some while you increase your involvement in others. This type of balance is what The Time Diet is all about.

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How to Get Ahead

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A slow workday is a great time to try to get ahead with your time management in hopes of easing the burden of your busy times. “Getting ahead” can mean doing things like organizing, planning, creating new systems and getting a jump on important Meat and Vegetable tasks. Think back to your most stressful weeks at work or school:
What were the tasks that took a majority of that time?
Is there anything you can do now that will make those tasks easier later?

I asked myself those questions this week.

I am a teacher and just finished the first week of school. I know that if I don’t start the year organized, I will never be able to catch up once the semester gets rolling. My husband works in travel and he knows that once the busy travel season hits, he’ll be knee-deep in work. We brainstormed some ways that we can use our slower times to ease the stress of our busy times. This is what we came up with:

Finishing Vegetable Tasks Early

This semester I am teaching an online class. I know that once the class starts, I will be spending a majority of my time grading and answering questions. To help ease that stress, I did as many of the organizational “Vegetable” tasks this class will require in advance so I won’t have to worry about them later. This included setting up all of my contact sheets, grading rubrics and supplemental materials. Now I won’t have to worry about all of that mid-semester!

Delegating to Technology

My husband works in travel. Each account his office processes has numerous deadlines to keep track of- deadlines for air, deadlines for hotels, deadlines for visas, etc…When many groups are traveling at once during the busy season, it can be a lot to keep track of by hand. That’s why this week, in their slower time, they set up a program that automatically calculates all of these deadlines and sets up reminders based on the expected travel date. They wouldn’t have had time to set this up during the busy season, but now their work will be much easier!

Organizing Differently

A large part of my time as a band teacher is taken up with keeping track of which students have their music and instrument on a given day and finding materials for them to use when they forget. There is nothing more frustrating than just beginning a rehearsal only to have to stop when a student walks in without his music. To fix this, I used my slow time to set up a binder for each instrument with a set of music for students to use when they forget. This binder also includes a piece of paper for them to sign their name when they need to use it. Now I don’t have to worry about stopping to mark down who forgot their materials. The students do that for me!

What things can YOU do early that help you in your busy times? Leave your idea as a comment! Maybe it will inspire someone else to do it too.

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