motivation

How To Solve Your Time Management Dilemma Over Lunch

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Time Management LunchHow many times has this happened to you? You’re at your wits’ end with a project. You know you’re wasting time going around in circles, but you don’t know what step to take next and in which direction. You know you should probably ask for help, but you don’t know who, where, or how, so you simply don’t, and continue the frustrating cycle. Sound familiar? Here is how I broke the cycle this week:

This week, I had a fabulous lunch with a dear friend that turned into a time management coaching session…for both of us. I’ve been going out of my mind the past few weeks as I’ve started to feel the pressure to tie up a million loose ends before Baby Schwartz makes her appearance. My friend was frustrated with a portion of a research paper that wasn’t coming together in a neat and tidy way.

Even though neither one of us could magically take away the other person’s frustration, it was immensely helpful to talk through it and brainstorm solutions. We both left feeling much more confident in our abilities to accomplish our goals. Here are three tips to do the same:

1. Don’t be afraid to admit you’re frustrated

Sometimes we’re afraid to ask for help or admit we’re stuck because we’re afraid of looking stupid or admitting weakness. It takes a strong person to articulate frustration and seek resources to solve a problem. Friends can be that resource.

2. Don’t just vent, look for solutions

Venting and complaining can bring a temporary sense of relief, but it doesn’t actually solve anything. After a brief complaining session, steer the conversation toward brainstorming solutions that can evolve into an actual plan.

3. Share your successes

Follow up with your friends and let them know what worked and what didn’t work! This is less for your friend’s sake, and more for yours. It helps celebrate your successes and focus on positive improvements instead of negative problems.

Finally, I recommend having these conversations over delicious food or coffee. The helpfulness of that factor simply can’t be overlooked 🙂

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3 Ways to Celebrate Success

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Time Management CelebrationsYOU are amazing and have accomplished incredible things. Have you stepped back and appreciated that recently?

Sometimes people are hesitant to celebrate success because it takes time, and they’re afraid they’ll become complacent with their accomplishments and lose the drive to keep moving forward. If we never lift our noses from the grindstone, we risk facing burnout, stress, and ultimately slowing our pace of productivity. Try these three steps to propel your motivation and energy forward while celebrating your past successes.

1. Write it down

Write down five things you’ve accomplished in the past year. They don’t have to be huge undertakings, just something that required some work and dedication. Treat yourself to a “Dessert” you enjoy, be it a hobby, a relaxing afternoon, or special meal. While you’re enjoying this Dessert, think of all the hard work that led you to that point and appreciate how good it feels to know you’ve accomplished something worthwhile. If these were team accomplishments, bring your coworkers in on the celebration!

2. Improve while still appreciating

Looking back at past successes is not only a chance to see how far you’ve come, but also see the opportunities for future improvement. Be careful not to brush off past accomplishments because they now seem small or trivial. Remember, those small, early successes are the foundation on which you continue to build.

3. Recognize success in others

We all know how difficult it is to take time to appreciate our work, so help others out with that process. Take a moment to tell your friend, colleague, or family member what a great job he or she did on a recent task. This doesn’t have to be a formal hand-written note. It could be as simple as stopping someone in the hallway and giving heartfelt recognition of a job well done. Appreciating success in others will also help you appreciate success in yourself.

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Are You Sabotaging Your Goals Before You Start?

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Time Management Goal SettingDo you share your goals or keep them to yourself? Your answer to that question might affect whether you achieve your goals or abandon them in the graveyard of good intentions.

If you’re anything like me, you enjoy telling people about your goals because it adds accountability. My Facebook feed is evidence that I am not alone in this belief. Scrolling through my updates on January 2nd, I was faced with countless goals, promises, and resolutions from my friends of everything from weight loss, to business aspirations, to habit breaking. In my time management seminars, I advocate for loud and proud goal-sharing as a way to strengthen your motivation, commitment and accountability. It worked for me, I’ve seen it work for other people, and I believe in the benefits.

Then I came across this TED talk about goal setting that caused me to question my belief. Essentially, Derek Sivers says that telling people about your goals makes you less likely to achieve them because the act of articulating your intentions satisfies your desire to follow through with them. In other words, telling other people you’re going to get organized makes you feel more organized, and therefore have less of a sense of urgency to actually get organized.

Interesting.

I find it difficult to accept that goal sharing is never useful, because as I said, I’ve seen it work countless times, but Derek presents a strong case. Instead, I offer these tips to share goals effectively.

1. Tell Your Friends How to Help You

When we share our goals, the assumption is that the people you tell can help you. Don’t just assume. Ask for a specific action. For example, instead of telling your friend, “I’m going to exercise every day,” say “I’m going to exercise every day, and if you ever hear me complain about it, please pull me off the couch.” Or “I’m trying to grow my business this year, so when you see me, please ask how it’s going to keep me accountable.”

2. Find a Friend With A Similar Goal

Friends and family are great support networks, but sometimes the best support comes from people who are working toward the same goal as you. Seek out friends and family who are striving to accomplish the same things and ask if you can sit down together and develop a plan. This provides both support and accountability.

3. Share the Results

If you’re afraid that public goal setting will make you less motivated to follow through, start with just sharing your results. When you accomplish a goal, no matter how small, tell your close friends and family. Sometimes we’re afraid to do this lest it be construed as bragging, but there is a difference between bragging and celebrating. Telling a friend what you accomplished, and what you plan to do next can provide support and encouragement to keep going. For example, “I finished this week with an empty inbox! Next week, I’m going to work on staying more focused while I’m working.”

Incidentally, it is my one of my goals, to give a TED talk some day (similar to the one in the video above), but I suppose now that I’ve told you about it, I can kiss that dream goodbye!

Got a comment? Leave one! I’d love to hear it.

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What Marathon Are You Running Today?

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Time Management MarathonWhen was the last time someone gave you a medal for a job well done? We don’t always get a chance to celebrate the results of our hard work, but when we do, it is certainly a feeling to relish. Just because we don’t always get a trophy, or a certificate, or even a pat on the back in recognition of our work, that doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate our successes on our own and reward the time we’ve put in to make it happen.

Today, I had the distinct pleasure of watching some of my friends run the PF Chang’s Half Marathon in Phoenix. I am not a runner, but I do bring a high level of sideline enthusiasm. As I watched them run past mile marker 11, closing in on the finish-line, I thought back to all of the time they had put into training – all of the early morning runs, the hours spent at the gym, and the afternoons spent resting their sore legs on the coach. I imagined how accomplished they felt as they neared closer and closer to finally crossing that finish line that had lingered in front of them through months of training.

I thought about how we’re all running our own marathons in our lives. We’re all working hard each day toward something. We’re all making sacrifices with our time, planning out our work schedule, and wondering how long it’ll be until we reach our goals. But, unlike a marathon, sometimes those goals and the paths to get there are vague and undefined.

Define Your Finish Line

The finish line of a race is very clearly marked, but what about other successes in our lives? How do we know that we’ve ever “made it” and that our hard work has paid off? Nebulous goals like “success” need tangible check points so we can both keep track of our progress and also give ourselves a pat on the back for a job well done. If you never take your nose away from the grindstone long enough to celebrate your successes, you may find yourself burned out long before you get where you thought it was you wanted to go.

Develop a Training Plan

If you want to run a marathon, there is no shortage of training plans available to help you prepare for a race of that magnitude. However, sometimes your path might be less trodden and more difficult to figure out. That doesn’t mean you can move forward without a plan. A novice runner seeks advice from an expert before developing a training schedule, and you similarly will save yourself time and energy by seeking advice from someone who has experience in whatever it is you want to do.

Bring Your Cheerleaders

When I asked where I should stand as a spectator at the half marathon, I was told to stake out a spot somewhere during the last two miles, because that’s when the runners need it most. Sure enough, when I asked my friend about the race, she told me that she had wanted to start walking, but knew I was going to be standing at the next mile marker and wanted to be running when she passed me. Our friends keep us going when we want to quit. Their encouragement motivates us and keeps us smiling. However, we can’t forget to ask for the support. I am not a marathon runner. I don’t really see it as a spectator sport and would never have thought to come stand on the sidelines, but my friends asked me to and I was more than eager to help out.

Whatever marathon you are training for in life right now, set yourself up for success with the right tools and cross the finish line with a smile.

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Why, Hello Motivation!

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Have you ever been suddenly motivated to complete a task that isn’t on the top of your priority list for the day? In a perfect world, we’d always be motivated to complete the most pressing task of the moment, but we know that’s hardly ever the case. We are all well-versed in the process of trying to dig up motivation to start a dreaded task, but what happens when we suddenly find that motivation at the wrong time?

My Sudden Motivation

I hate cleaning. I know I’d be hard-pressed to find someone who truly loves the chore, but I feel as though I have a particularly difficult time motivating myself to throw out my useless clutter. You can imagine my shock when I woke up this morning thinking, “I really want to clean out the garage today.”

Here is my problem: cleaning the garage was not terribly high on the priority list. I have a few big projects to wrap up before Thanksgiving weekend and I had a productive day planned to make progress on all of them. As I sat down to work though, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I should really pounce on my sudden motivation to organize.

Do I choose the more “important” task that I have no problem motivating myself to do, or the less important task that I usually dread?

After careful contemplation, I chose the latter.

The Right Decision

For three hours this afternoon, I sorted, threw away, cleaned, stacked, shredded, etc… I was definitely on a roll. As the third hour came to a close, a sudden feeling of frustration came over me. “I kind of hate this,” I said out loud. As quickly as it had come, my motivation was now gone. It was at that moment I realized I had made the right decision for the day.

Finding an extra hour or two over the next few days to squeeze in a little more work would be easy. Waiting for cleaning motivation to strike again could be endless. With just a few short hours of work, I could now walk into my garage without bumping into things. If I hadn’t been motivated, that could have easily taken the whole day.

Your Turn

Sometimes it’s best to do the task you are most motivated to do. You work most efficiently when you’re motivated and motivation is hard to conjure up. Notice I didn’t say it’s always best to make this decision. If I had a huge deadline coming up tomorrow, my cleaning crusade would have had to wait. Will you choose motivation or importance this week? Can you find a balance?

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3 Crucial Things Busy People Know

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“If you want something done, ask a busy person.” Even though that statement seems so backwards, we all know it to be true. People with packed schedules always find the time to squeeze in one more thing. But is it possible to harness that level of efficiency without a crammed calendar? Absolutely. You just have to learn the time management secrets that busy people know.

1. We have more time than we realize

Much like people on a diet account for each calorie they consume, busy people account for each minute of their time. They know about Parkinson’s Law, that work expands to fill the time we have available, and therefore don’t give themselves two hours to get ready in the morning, or an hour and half to check email. When they sit down to work, they work efficiently and with the utmost focus, eliminating Time Killers that try to make their task take longer.

2. Don’t wait to want to do something

Sometimes there are tasks on our list that we aren’t looking forward to doing. When we don’t want to do something, we put it off hoping we’ll feel more like doing it tomorrow…as though enjoyment of a task was a necessary prerequisite. Busy people don’t think like that. They know their time is limited and it’s better to just do undesirable tasks now and get them off their plates and off their minds.

3. Put your head down and start grazing

Busy people know that worrying about a big workload is a waste of resources. Remember the story about the two cows:

“Two cows were both faced with an immense pasture of grass to graze. The first cow looked around and said, ‘Oh my goodness. There is so much grass here. How will I ever get through it all?’ While the first cow stood and worried, the second cow said nothing, and put her head down and started grazing.”

If we spend less time worrying and more time doing we not only lower our stress level, but we find that worrying was taking up a lot of time and energy that we could have spent on being productive.

The point of working efficiently is not to make time for even more work. The point of working efficiently is to get our work done quickly, so we can have more time for the enjoyable Desserts in life that are truly important.

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Are You Letting Fear Hold You Back?

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This week, you will likely see some spooky ghosts and goblins on your doorstep. However, Halloween isn’t the only time we encounter things that scare us. Some of our fears follow us year round and try to both interfere with our time management, and inhibit us from accomplishing our goals. Unfortunately, it will take more than some free candy to make these scary things go away.

We strive to have excellent time management skills to efficiently work toward our goals. Sometimes, even though we know the steps we need to take in order to reach our target, we let our fears get in the way.  Be careful not to let these three fears stop you from reaching your goals.

1. Fear of The Unknown

Even though we may be dreaming of change, the fact of the matter is, it can be a terrifying concept. The unknown is scary. Sometimes it’s easier to put off taking concrete steps toward a goal simply because the status quo is so familiar. Don’t let yourself fall into this trap. If you need help taking that first step into the unknown, look around. You probably aren’t the first one to venture down that path.

2. Fear of Failure

Failure is not enjoyable and in an effort to protect ourselves from that horrible feeling, we sometimes avoid trying at all. If we never try, we won’t succeed, but we also don’t run the risk of failing! This avoidance isn’t something we’re always completely aware of. A common method of failure avoidance is to busy ourselves with so many other things that we can tell ourselves we “don’t have time” to accomplish what we know is really important. Remember: we make time for what’s important to us. Failure, while painful to our ego, doesn’t have to be a dead end, but is rather a necessary pit stop on the way to success.

3. Fear of Disappointing Others

Many of us let other people dictate the way we spend our time. We do things not necessarily because we want to do them, but because we think it’s what others expect of us and we don’t want to let them down. Here is the thing: other people don’t care nearly as much as you think they do. People who are close to you just want you to be happy, and people who aren’t close to you are too busy worrying about how everyone else is perceiving them, that they don’t have time to judge how you’re spending your time. You need to devote your time and energy to tasks that support your own goals, not the goals of others.

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Time Management? That’s Debatable

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“That’s ridiculous” “You don’t know what you’re talking about” “That’s just not true.”

These could be statements from one of the recent Presidential debates, but you might also recognize them from the internal time management debate we have in our heads all the time. When we don’t want to do something, our responsible side says we need to do it anyway, and our inner procrastinator says to do it later. Consider the following when you’re trapped in a time management debate.

 1.  You Never Regret Productivity

Think about it like this, when we convince ourselves to tackle something now instead of putting it off, we rarely ever say, “Gosh, I really wish I hadn’t done that.” However, when we choose to procrastinate, we rarely say, “That was a wonderful decision.” Use this experience to your advantage.

2.  Imagine the Worst Case Scenario

Rather than think of the benefits of getting work done early, sometimes it’s more effective to think of the problems that come from procrastinating. Think of what the worst possible scenario could be if you put off your work. If that scenario sounds unappealing to you, start the task now to avoid it.

3. Find a Productivity Coach

It’s usually pretty easy to find people in our lives who will encourage and enable us to procrastinate, however, it’s important to find that one friend or colleague who instead tells you to snap to your senses and just start your work. Think of this friend as your “Productivity Coach” who you can call when you are in need of some help in your time management debate. Sometimes just hearing another person weigh in can give your productive side enough of a boost to be victorious.

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Training Your Eye to See Progress

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When we sit down to work, we feel most productive when the task in front of us gets smaller. We thrive on the satisfaction of watching it shrink. But what happens when the task seems to get bigger as we work? This can be a huge de-motivator in our time management if we don’t make a few easy alterations to our expectations.

Changing Your Expectations

These types of expectations aren’t just reserved for working. I discovered a similar scenario when pulling into my driveway yesterday. In Arizona, you need two types of grass on your lawn during the year: summer and winter. The summer grass can withstand the triple digit temperatures, but won’t do well in the winter. When I came home yesterday, I noticed that my front yard was a disaster. All of the grass was brown and it looked like the gardeners were tearing it up. My whole community looked like a barren dust bowl.

To an outsider, it would look like we had a gardening nightmare on our hands. But a trained eye knows better. A trained eye, who has lived in a desert climate, knows that this is a sign of progress. You must let the summer grass go dormant before you over-seed for winter, even though the process might look a little ugly.

Training Your Eye

A trained eye knows what progress looks like, even if the initial stages of progress look a little…messy. Once you’ve completed a big task a few times, you’ll start to recognize what the early signs of progress look like. To an untrained observer, it may look like a messy disaster, but you’ll know differently. You’ll know that sometimes tasks need to look bigger before they can look smaller and that if done correctly, it’s all part of the process.

Patience

This of course takes patience. Sometimes we get frustrated that a task doesn’t appear to be going away and we’ll try to rush the process. Imagine if my community gardeners didn’t get the summer grass out of the way before putting the winter grass down. Initially it might seem that everyone’s lawns look neater, but we’ll be stuck with brown piles of straw when winter hits. Don’t skip steps when completing your big tasks in an effort to make them look “done” faster.

Know that progress doesn’t always look like we think it should and sometimes tasks must seem bigger before they can get smaller and eventually be completed.

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Stop Setting Yourself Up To Fail

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“I’m just not that good at time management.” “I’m not an organized person.” “I’m a born procrastinator.”

These are some of the things I’ve heard people say to account for missed deadlines or a lack of productivity. However, when we attribute our productivity failures to a seemingly unchangeable personal trait, we don’t leave ourselves much opportunity or hope for improvement.

In order to change our productivity trajectory, we must first realize that we have the ability to change it. Otherwise, all of the time management advice in the world doesn’t stand a chance of helping.

Analyze Your Effort

During my time teaching elementary school music, one of my students was almost pulled from my program due to failing math grades. I took him aside and said, “What’s the deal? I know you are a smart and motivated student, but your math teacher tells me you don’t put forth any effort on your math homework.” He replied, “Mrs. Schwartz. I’m bad at math. Why in the world would I waste my time trying when I know I’m bad at something?”

He was stuck in a perpetual cycle. He said he was bad at math, so he put forth little effort…which in turn, made him continue to get worse!

When we label ourselves a “bad time manager” we can’t help but try less. We all have our own strengths and weaknesses, and everyone will not be equally stellar at all tasks, but we must take an honest look at whether or not we mask a lack of effort with a label of failure. Instead of saying “I’m bad at time management” tweak your thinking to be, “Time management doesn’t come as easily to me, so I’m going to have to try harder than most to meet my deadlines.”

Change Your Strategy

“The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.” Few people would disagree with that famous quote, yet we often let ourselves get trapped in a perpetual cycle of failure anyway. If you’ve tried to manage your time with the same calendar, the same to-do list, and the same strategies for years and they aren’t working, then you’re long over due for a change! Some methods work better for different people. Perhaps the reason you haven’t found time management success is because you’re struggling to use a method that just doesn’t work for you. Try changing your approach instead of instantly labeling yourself a productivity failure.

Stop the Comparison

The quickest way to get stuck in a motivational rut is to compare yourself to others. Having role models is important, but there is a difference between a constructive admiration of someone’s ability, and a constant comparison of yourself to everyone around you. This leads to only seeing the good in others and only seeing the bad in ourselves.

We might beat ourselves up over the fact that our colleague always finishes projects three times faster than we do, or that a friend finds time to be involved in countless hobbies while we struggle to maintain one or two. What we might overlook is that same colleague may never spend time with her family or that friend may be cracking under the stress of all his obligations.

Don’t strive to be better at managing your obligations than others. Strive to be the best time manager you need to be to accomplish your goals.

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